Monday, August 18, 2008

Family Drama

Families can be a pain in the ass sometimes.

Essential Background Information: My Aunt Margaret (on my Mom's side) is slowly and I mean slowly recovering from throat cancer. She had had both Kemo and Radiation treatments. Last year around Thanksgiving, they finally took out her feeding tube. Well, they had to put it back in about 2 weeks ago. She had been having trouble swallowing and coughing too much after she would eat or drink. Turns out the flapper valve (don't know the technical term) that closes off your lungs when you eat/drink had hardened a bit, so it was not closing off and food/liquid was getting into her lungs. So she ended up with pneumonia and the Dr's determined that she needed to have the feeding tube put back in and to restrict her eating by mouth again. Before the cancer, she weighed around 200 lbs. Then she dropped to 100 lbs. She had gained back about 20 lbs, but this last bought of pneumonia dropped her back down to 102 lbs.

Margaret has 3 children. The oldest daughter is out of the picture. She became an alcoholic and Aunt Margaret ended up raising her 3 kids. The oldest grandchild has since moved out and lives on her own, but the other 2 are 14 & 12 and still live with Margaret. They have been very good about taking over most of the home chores. The middle, a son, went to college got a great job in OH, married some snooty rich girl and decided he didn't want to associate with the rest of his white trash family. He neither invited his mother to the wedding nor did he even tell her when he had a kid(s). She found out second hand when one of his friends asked why she wasn't at the wedding. The youngest daughter has been a godsend in helping her mother through this. She and my Mother have been taking turns driving Margaret back and forth to her Dr appts., getting her groceries, her medicine, etc. And trying to sooth the worry of the 2 granddaughters who still live with her. I know it has been very tough on Tracy having to shoulder the worry of caring for her ill mother and to see how she went from being so robust to so frail that you're afraid to give her a hug for fear of hurting her.

Now comes the Drama: Aunt Margaret's oldest granddaughter, Sarah, has a son who is about 16-18 months old. He is such a cutey. The only problem is that, Sarah has been leaving Ethin with Aunt Margaret too much. He is a very active little boy who weighs at least 25 lbs. He's always on the move and into things and Margaret is just not healthy or strong enough to be taking care of him. On Friday, Tracy called her Mom, didn't get an answer, so drove over. Margaret had fallen down the outside steps while carrying Ethin. Luckily no one was hurt, but they could have both been seriously injured. There are about 4-5 steps and the porch is about 3-4 feet off the ground. Tracy called my Mom/Dad, who rushed over to help. They were all upset because Margaret had had Ethin all week. And they all had words about how Sarah shouldn't be using Margaret as a free babysitter, so that she can do her own thing; partying, going to the bar, etc. So, Tracy packed up Ethin and took him back to his Mom. Which made Margaret upset, because she loves taking care of Ethin. I think it makes her feel useful. Well, the proverbial shit hit the fan after that. Sarah called Tracy and left a very nasty/threatening message on her answering machine stating that Tracy wasn't allowed to come see Margaret anymore and that she should keep her nose out of other peoples business and that the next time Sarah saw her, she was going to beat the shit out of her. Can you say "evidence"? She also called my father to cuss him out. However my Dad wouldn't stand for it and said if she wanted to cuss him out she could come do it in person and hung up on her. Tracy has a few police officer friends, so she called one. He came over, taped the answering machine message and said he would talk to Sarah. He goes out to Sarah's and tells her she can't threaten people. Sarah tries saying she never threatened Tracy. The officer asks her nicely if she would like to hear the recording. No, she 'suddenly' remembered what was said. Then, she starts yelling about Tracy never doing anything for Aunt Margaret and that the next time she saw her, she was going to beat the crap out of her. The officer (I'm sure is shaking his head at her stupidity) says that's threat #2 and if she tries it, that's jail time.

I just can't figure what goes through peoples minds some times. Or should I say what doesn't.


Anita O said...

Ahh the drama. If you get to feeling too bad, turn on Springer. Then you can say you're family is not messed up as theirs.
I can totally relate. Totally.

Anonymous said...

Unbelieveble. The one I feel sorry for is Ethin. Sarah needs to get her head out of her a**. I admire Tracy for sticking by her mom and having been there for her all this time.